Day Five: Depression and Eating

Day 4: Sorry I did not blog but I was out of the house all day. I did not log my food as I was away from the computer and did not work out. Lessons Learned.
1. Buy a portable food journal.
2. Work out at the beginning of the day because excuses become more
numerous as the day goes by.
January 4th begins the day with me facing my worst weight loss enemy - Depression. As many of you know I recently found out that a very close friend, in fact I would say the best friend I ever had took his life two years ago. The messed up thing is that I have been looking for him him these last two years. Everyone knew I was looking for him but no one thought to tell me. Of course everyone has their excuses; mostly that I was pregnant at the time and they thought the "stress" would hurt the baby. Fine .. the baby is now 2 years old, no one thought to tell me so I did not spend hours on the computer looking for him!? !?
So what does this have to do with my weight loss? As I have started coming to terms with all this I face a battery of emotions and instead of dealing with them in a healthy adult way, I deal with them with the way I know best- Food. I was lucky today that my kids were around me snapping me out of my fog from time to time and I was able to realize what I was doing. But I have been guilty many days of sitting down to drown my blues with cookies or ice cream and not realizing what I am doing, or maybe not caring, until the food is all gone.
To be honest I'm not sure how that started, I have heard people say that its learned behavior from when we are children. Parents give us food to shut us up if we are crying, help us celebrate if we are happy, so we tie our emotions to food. I don't know if this is true but as an adult there comes a time when I have to stop blaming my parents for my actions. So the lesson learned today was that I need to find a healthy outlet. I need to really reflect on this, maybe look for someone I can talk to about it all.

Overview for Today:
Calories taken in:1,690
Work out : 3 1/2 miles walked